Road To Recovery

When in isolation
one is looking for hope
in these desperate times
all is lost

when in isolation
one wants love
crave a company 
yet to feel or breath is absolute bravery
spent years in solitude 
lost all feelings along the road

when in isolation
one is looking for something
that frees thy lost souls
to compromise or to fight endlessly
to cry or to laugh at thy funerals

we came a long way to pretend
pretend to be lovers
yet we once were
yes we loved one another
cherished the purity of our feelings

but all we ended up with
is a funeral of hearts
he looked at me with his hazel eyes
as if it is the end of life
but it was just the beginning of the story
it all escalated quickly 
reached its end within seconds
everything that is beautiful
everything that created life 
and brought joy into our hearts
all is lost

he said with desperation 
"you brought sunshine to my life
a light that shines all that's dark
break me once 
thousands of times
I'll love you still..
move forward with me and I'll give you the world
just love me endlessly."

that curiosity to get closer
just to know what words meant to her
and what kept them apart
to break free
and let those boundaries behind
she questioned his intentions 
with doubts and all of her fears
it occupied every mind

"do you even remember? 
our days of love and grace?
the innocence and purity we once had?"

he took her hand and placed it in his chest..
"all is lost
all is lost..
how we reached the end so soon?
we are strangers now
walking by
wandering around at the lonely nights
all we had is affection that's beyond!"

as we all had a history 
might be dark or just a lovely mystery 
I'd walk with you down to that road
the road to recovery
I'd cross miles and all the seas
for you and for the love you once gave me
but you left me empty handed
with your dishonesty that breaks every wall 
destroyed everything that's beautiful

When in isolation 
one is weak 
one is fragile
left alone with those strange feelings
with loss and despairs
and the overflow of thoughts
scattered all over with emptiness 
"a dead end we've reached I see"

we were like the kings and queens
world is ours
all bright and lovely
owned it all in one hand
we smiled, sang along to the stars
walked hand in hand by the shores
and had the waves as music to our ears
life .. what's life? when we had paradise?

a dream it seemed
or a past life of our sinful souls
"you say our love is eternal?
but you left me halfway, alone and broken
you say you'd die for me?
but you died in the arms of another.."

years and years passed
as I grew colder and colder
a stone hearted and less pitiful
"time heals you say?
how it can heals all sorrows
when scars is all that I've left"

in this long solitude
you finally want to surrender
let go of it all and just float like a feather
here I am.. sat down by blue seashore
recalling your last words..
as I wait for the lost guest
to knock on my door
maybe any minute now..

I do not believe all is lost..
yet with every tragic loss
there's a light
that eventually shines on.

The good, the bad and the ugly

That's just a draft I've not been able to finish but thought to post something new as I've not been for a while.


The good, the bad and the ugly ..


At a heart beat I've found you
Across the room I felt the need to speak
Among the crowd I craved only thee

A smile or a grin
Didn't matter at all
Just a look at his face warms me all

Though I've not catch your name
Yet emotions are flowing like the river
Overwhelmed by it all with every heart beat

I know it was you
All along it was you
The one my heart wants

What we seek is what we get
Good, bad or ugly
Good we love .. Bad we barley talk .. Ugly we could never be

But truth is I've finally found my missing piece
Finally the sun shines and the sky is blue again
As if I'm in a dream

With all I've conquered
And all I've witnessed
The minute your eyes catches mine I feel safe

I might have fallen for you
But it's strange how my past isn't haunting me
Strange how peaceful life is with you

Yes love and what's not
We are here now
Born again.

Lames

this is a tribute to my courageous friend Lames Dirbas, who passed away on March 17



To live with a hole in your heart
Of her memories it pains me all
As I went through her messages
I shed a tear

How can I bare the grieve
Ah I know I am no longer breathing
Happiness is lost
When there's no you

Cry no more I said to myself
Yet I'm here weeping, grieving over and over
With the thought of you
I die from the inside every single time

You were a star to admire
A light that shined every soulless life
You were the hope
The strength of every heartbreak

Everything beautiful..
That was you
A true friend
That I'll remember with every heartbeat

I'll treasure your memories
And with every passing minute I'll miss you
Here I'm with eyes full of tears
Nothing can disclose the pain I feel

Yet I feel lucky to had the chance to know you
I feel special and thankful
But for sure my dear Lames
Is eternally a shining star